“I have learned, that the person I have to ask for forgiveness from the most is: myself. You must love yourself. You have to forgive yourself, every day, whenever you remember a shortcoming, a flaw, you have to tell yourself “That’s just fine”. You have to forgive yourself so much until you don’t even see those things anymore. Because that’s what love is like.” -C. JoyBell C.
“Forgiving yourself, believing in yourself and choosing to love yourself are the best gifts one could receive.” -Brittany Burgunder
“Only you can decide how your fires will affect you. Will you be sanctified or scarred” -Beth Moore
Why is it so much harder to forgive yourself than it is to forgive another person? Yesterday, I wrote about how important it is to forgive others. I think it is even more crucial to learn to forgive yourself.
Why is it we seem to hold ourselves more accountable than we do others?
For me, I believe that I hold myself more accountable because I can control what I do. I can not control what other people do. I feel like I know better so I should have done better. I know right from wrong, so I should have chosen correctly. We tend to make excuses for others, especially people who we love. For example, maybe they weren’t taught right from wrong, maybe they didn’t have good role models, or maybe they are just people who have been hurt in the past. When we give a reason for their behavior it tends to make it easier to forgive them. I know that if I don’t understand why a person did something, it is a lot harder for me to forgive them. I have much higher expectations for myself than I do of others so when I fall short it makes me feel like a failure. Here are some reasons why you need to forgive yourself:
- For Inner Peace
You won’t be able to truly move on and learn from your mistakes until you forgive yourself. Do yourself a favor and stop being held captive by resentment, grudges, anger, or disappointment. Joyce Meyer says, “Our past may explain why we’re suffering but we must not use it as an excuse to stay in bondage.” We can’t truly move forward, while we still continue to constantly look backward.
- You Can’t Forgive Others If You Can’t Forgive Yourself
If you are still carrying around old baggage from past mistakes, you won’t be able to look at others through clean glasses. Your past hurts and disappointments will directly affect how you treat others.
- So You Can Be A Healthier Person
By not forgiving yourself, you will probably carry around a lot of guilt. Guilt can present itself as anger or sadness. Anger and sadness can deplete your energy, can lead to anxiety, panic attacks, low self-esteem, depression, stress, and all this can have a huge negative effect on your body and personal relationships. According to WebMD, guilt “puts you at risk for minor stuff like headaches and backaches” And that isn’t all, WebMD also states, “it [guilt] also contributes to cardiovascular disease and gastrointestinal disorders. It can even have a negative impact on the immune system over time.”
- Because You Love Yourself
Forgive yourself because you love yourself and you deserve forgiveness.
I know this can be difficult for some people. It is not easy for me to forgive myself. We are worth it. We deserve forgiveness.