How did you go from this (pictures above) to pre-k so quickly? I blinked and you went from needing me 24/7 to running off to meet pre-k with a sense of adventure and determination, alone, without your mommy. I have been crying on and off all morning since I dropped you off. I won’t let you see me cry because this is good for you. I want you to love school and be excited. I don’t want my fears and sadness to hold you back from greatness and moving forward in your life and in your accomplishments. These are only tears of letting go. I do fear for you. I hope the kids are being kind to my little boy, I hope you aren’t feeling scared or overwhelmed, and I pray you aren’t needing a hug and I’m not there to give you one. I pray you have a great day and want to continue going. I don’t want this to be a bad experience for you. So I wait. I watch the clock slowly tick, closer and closer towards the time I need to leave to go pick you up. I pray that you will have only good things to tell me when I see you at 11:15.
Finally, I get to load up and come to get you. I’m coming for you, little man. I can’t wait to hear about your day. I walk in your classroom door with a sense of urgency, and I find you waiting for me, with a huge smile on your face!! The teacher said you did, “Marvelous!” You didn’t cry, or seem scared, or overwhelmed. You didn’t get into trouble. You enjoyed getting to eat breakfast at the school, they had “awesome juice,” and you met some friends. Immediately upon seeing your excitement, I let out a sigh of relief. You gave your little brother a big hug, held his hand while we walked across the street, and asked for “boot nuggets,” from McDonald’s. You said you can’t wait until tomorrow!
It is now 7:00 pm, and you have been asleep since 6:15. You asked me to rock you to sleep tonight and I responded with a very enthusiastic, “YES!” (FOLKS!! He might have started pre-k today, but my baby boy still asked for his mama to rock him tonight!! I’ll take that. 🙂 🙂 My heart is full.)
What have I learned over the last four years??